We woke bright and early, after a couple hours of sleep - which is less than we wanted, but better than our trip to Morocco. We called Ali to make sure he was on the way, and he was already in the neighborhood, probably not wanting to wake us up. Lots of bags, in and out, a few last minute things on a checklist (copies of keys to neighbor, shut the shed, etc...) and off we went, the family filling the van and Ali with Maryam the Explorer riding in the cab of the Reefer truck. We stopped at the bank for a final cash injection, and hit the interstate to rush-hour traffic on 85- which while congested, was mercifully brisk.
Unloading at the airport was uneventful, though humorous, with this huge cube track and "Halal International" on the side, and us unloading 28 or so bags (2 big rolling bags, a rollaboard, and a smaller backpack/satchel for each of the seven of us) on the sidewalk. I took some pictures [INSERT PICTURES] of the scene for posterity, and we big Ali farewell. I drove the van to long-term parking, but missed the shuttle by about 60 seconds. I walked the full length of the parking lot hoping to catch up with it, to miss its exit by about ... 60 seconds. C'est la Vie, non? A bit later I was back at the terminal, where Munira and the kids had moved all the bags just inside. Following Rose's advice, we asked if we could check them all internationally right there, rather than switch at JFK, and they said to take everything down to international check-ins - which was of course the next section of the airport. So we did, and I got started with that process, and proceeded to grab the kids and start going back and forth with the bags- thank the good Lord for smooth floors and bags with wheels. A far cry from my memories of travel as a child - where we had lots of big heavy bags, and seemed to have to carry them all the time.
So my plans of getting on a plane without sweating were dashed, as the guys at the counter proved remarkably adept at processing our bags faster than we could get them up there- with 14 51lb (more or less) bags, I didn't want to keep the growing line waiting. We finished there, went thru security which had almost no line, and proceeded to gum that up right off. How do you pass thru the kids if they can't lift their bags on to the conveyor - you could send them first, but then they wouldn't be able to get the stuff off... so it ended up being a bit of a mess, but eventually we all made it through, reconstituted our bags and headed to the gate - which because it was domestic, was back into the main terminal and out to another concourse. What's funny is as I was trying to line up the bags out of the way after the security checkpoint, a guard said we couldn't leave the bags (10 feet away) unattended. So I dragged them back to where they were in everyone's way. Gotta love underpaid TSA flunkies. What they need to do is pay all the porters to be TSA agents, so they could make money from tips, but also keep a "friendly" eye on things, and come across as helpful as well. As it is, most of those folks just come across as drones who enforce a part-line that doesn't make much sense anyway. But that's another story for another time.
So to the gate, hanging for a while, kids to the bathroom, Maryama and Yaseen and I for a walk (he's REALLY eager to get on a plane at this point, and doesn't understand why he can't yet). Back to the gate, and a short trip to cinabon to give Noura her promised Birthday stop - she forgoes the bun for the sticks, and we all gorge on several five-packs. Then I'm back for some hashbrowns for Munira and the kids. We boarded, unable to muster the troops and their bags in the 25 second window they give for "passengers with small children or anyone else needing special assistance" and so end up waiting by the gate for our rows. Munira handled it quite well when I decided to make a bathroom break. She's getting much better at this. We worked our way in - proving to be a bit of a challenge since the kids were each schlepping a rolling bag which is only a bit smaller than the aisle itself, along with another bag- which of course gets caught on the seats and elsewhere. I ended up sitting on my own in an Emergency exit, just behind the others. At that point, I wondered where my cushion was. I have a temperpedic cushion I always travel- and have for 8 years. I've almost lost it many times, and actually lost it once, and immediately bought another- but they cost almost $100 so I even put my phone number on it (and recently had an airport guard call my cell to retrieve it in Oklahoma City!).
Munira remembered it coming off the truck, but not much after that. My thoughts are that maybe it was at security, or in the seating area - but at this point the plane is finishing final boarding. I went to the front of the plane and talked to them, and then out to the gate agent, who said I had 7 minutes. Then I ran- and I don't mean jogged, or trotted, I mean RAN - ran as in $100!!!, you gotta be kidding me! I have to buy another one??! I arrived at the security checkpoint, breathing heavily, reminding myself that I really do need to get into better shape, and explained to the guard what was going on. He walked out to the seating area just outside the place we'd been, and then went down to where he thought we were before. At this point, Munira called my cell to ask where I was, reminding me that I had all our tickets and our passports, and doing her best not to get upset. At this point, I had probably 2 minutes to get back, found that the guard had found nothing, and RAN again back to the gate. Nodded to the agent at the door, who said "good job" and jogged down the gangway and back on to the plane. So now my hopes of getting on my flight without sweating a LOT were dashed. But hey, it beat trying to get on the red-eye++ after Dabney's funeral, and we were on our way.
The flight was uneventful (God, that sounds so cliche - been said a thousand times) - the kids enjoyed it, and during those sorts of things my "I'm glad I'm a Dad" instinct kicks in and I enjoy watching them absorb the new experience. We did a heavy banked turn coming into JFK and Moby thought it was cool and Noura thought it was scary, and we landed. This was the "inaugural" flight of USAirways from Charlotte to JFK, and so they'd never actually done it before- so getting off the plane was interesting. There was no gang-way, so we took the steps, but then we had to go UP the steps coming off the gangway (with our carry-on bags- which in case you hadn't absorbed it by now, were numerous and heavy). Into the terminal (gee, international terminals are much cooler - oreos at the gate, and comfortable chairs) and out and down and around to find the airtrain - then up and onto the train and into terminal C or was it 4? where most of the stuff happens. We found the Prayer room (the label says "multi denominational" room, and is next to a catholic room, some other kind of christian chapel, and an synagogue, so the room had clearly been taken over by Muslims, with angled carpets, a mimbar (steps, cover, and all) a quibla, shoe area, shelves, etc... I wonder what the story behind the name not changing was. At one point I was vacuuming, and this couple and their kids walked in - she telling him "it says multi-denominational" and me telling them to take their shoes off if they were going to walk on the carpet. My tone was strong enough that they turned around and walked out. It's always amazed me how obvlivious folks are to things. I mean, here's a room with HUGE PICTURES of Mecca and Medina, a shoe-rack, a woman with a scarf on, and a prayer niche - and they waltz in with their shoes on. I wouldn't walk into a church or a synagogue, or any place that appeared holy or sacred without some sense of awareness of my environment. If anyone wants to pray, that's fine - but have the decency to think about the hundreds of people who will put their forheads and noses against that carpet... but there I go again.
The kids had a romp, and we returned to the room a few times, eventually to pray Thuhr and Asr before our flight. We spent the afternoon in the terminal, getting some food, walking around, letting the kids nap. Eventually we were able to check in, which went pretty well, while the floor agent teased the guy at the computer saying, "I wouldn't have given you such a hard time if you'd told me you were checking in a family of SEVEN!" We went down to security, which only shortly before had been almost vacant, and suddenly it was crowded. We made for an interesting picture, the tall guy with the hat in the lead, followed by 5 kids in blue shirts, followed by the woman in the scarf. Security was the typical fiasco, now with them telling everyone to not have any drinks, but with no way to really check. I suppose maybe you can see a bottle thru the x-rays, but I have my doubts. "Excuse me sir, do you have any liquid explosives in your bags?" "Why yes I do." "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to dump them in the trash...". I mean, really. If you were up to no good, would you answer the question, or obey the rule- or even try such a thing with the new rules in place? I wonder if Jello counts as a liquid. It's only solid when it's cold. What's funny is that you pick up your duty-free alcohol and perfume at the gate- so let's not let security ever interfere with making real money. It's one thing to deprive me of my mountain dew on the flight, but let's not keep Mr. Sampson away from his Johnny Walker. Although with Mountain Dew running 3 bucks a pop (so to speak) at JFK, it's good money!
So we're muddling thru security (I'm wondering if I should write this in past or present tense, and can't seem to make up my mind) , having not thought up a better way of not repeating the mess in Charlotte - and next thing I know they've taken a bag to inspect, and Noura is sobbing and in tears. They've found the small gerber multi-tool (no, not the ones you are all used to- these are SMALL, about 2-3 inches long) that I'd given her a year or so back. It fold out to have scissors (with blades about an inch, but pointed) and includes some other tools. She'd packed it in with her string bracelet klutz set, and they found it. She was devastated, telling the agent she was sorry, telling me she was sorry (since it was a gift for her) and probably thinking she was about to be shipped off to the gulag. The agent was nice, explaining that it came with the kit, and so it wasn't her fault, and in typical Noura/Munira fashion, she said "no, I put it in there with it" - way to give up a gimmme!! It was too funny, and we tried to calm her down. I hoped he'd just give it back - I mean the day you can hijack an international flight with a pair of folding scissors is the day that civilization NEEDS to end - but no dice. She was devastated, and I tried to explain to her that they cost all of about 2.5 Mountain Dews at JFK, and I'd bring her another one (having found another one sitting around somewhere, and for some reason not packing it). I asked the agent if I could give it to him, rather than have them throw it away (giving my aversion to wasted) and he said they get dozens a day. This leads me to believe that every TSA agent in the country has the best collection of multi-tools around. I mean, I sure as heck wouldn't throw them away if I could get away with it - what a waste!! They should let you pay $1 to take a polaroid of your tool, and then have a station on the other end where you can show the picture and pick up one there that looks like it... but such solutions require a creativity that such agencies lack. The reason we are secure is because terrorism is really not a threat. The reason we are not secure is because determined terrorists (of which there are really almost none) will be more creative and imaginative then big government agencies.
As we were regrouping, this time out of the way of the stream of people, the agent came up to me and explained that because the folks at the x-rays were new, and in need of training, they would use this set of scissors to help train them, and not throw them away. Now this presented me with an interesting and humorous paradox. I was happy they weren't wasted, but not at all happy that now the security folks would be more senstivie to harmless gerber scissors (again, these were not the tools that have a foldout knife - they were much smaller, and didn't even include pliers). So was the NOT wasting of those going to be the cause of MORE waste and annoyance in the future? Sigh... If I liked to talk even more trash I'd go into how we could take apart our laptops and use the variuos parts of it to make some pretty scary shanks, but I'll save that for another rant. How something that looks like shampoo could be potentially more dangerious than something that looks like a Lithium Ion or Nickel-metal hydride laptop battery Cremains a mystery to me. To digress a little, I had this weird thought when all the news was coming in from the UK about these "liquid explosives". For the record, everyone should know that YEARS ago, I made a comment that I've repeated many times that Code Red Mountain Dew looks a lot like Gasoline. Now I never actually put them in a jar side by side, but thought about it a few times. For those of you who've never messed with gasoline- it's scary stuff. Forget liquid explosives - just think about plain 'ol gasoline. If you don't doubt the danger there, pour a gallon of it onto a pile of wood, stand back, and throw a match (really, stand back... way back). It's not like in the movies where the fire creeps along the liquid- it'll catch much faster than you could run. So I'm off on a tangent again- what I though of when this started happening was, that it would be funny if some guy who owned a store that sold drinks in the airport had made some anonymous calls to get the government worked up about liquids - sales would go up a bit inside terminals. I don't actually think anything of the sort happened, but grin a little over the possibilities. Just wait until the next scare has them using laptops as bombs... then we'll have a reall mess on our hands. What we really need are two different airline systems. Those who like high security and all the inconvenience, and those who are not really worried about it (gee, I wonder where I fall?) - with the explicit agreement that any plane going off course will be summarily shot down if it presents a threat. I'd be down with that! But seriously, not enough imagination going around for that sort of thing...
Well, this has turned into quite a rant already... so let's finish the trip story. For starts, South African Airlines is way cool - at least the flight we were on. Lots of overhead space, screens on the back of all seats with unlimited movies and such and a wide selection, and free headphones. I gave up on sleeping much, and ended up watching 3 movies. We were able to shift our seats so I could sit next to Noura, and one row back we had 5 seats in a row. Munira did well handling all the other kids- and I felt guity - but not too much because small people are a LOT more comfortabl on these sorts of trips. To give you an idea of what it's like- I can't wash my face in the sink because when i lean forward, my backside hits the wall, and my forhead hits the mirror- there's now way to get my face anywhere near the sink. It's actually sort of funny, after the fact - but was a bit frustrating then. How do you spit in the sink when you brush your teeth if you can't get within 2 feet of it? Yeah, there's always the toilet, but really...
But now it's gone past midnight, and it's on to Thursday, which is the day we arrived.
my family, the Sheikh and a few of his folks, and the other kids from the school. The drive took a good while - proabably an hour and a half to cover 35 miles- but so it goes here. I've seen a lot of places where they work on cars and trucks- often sitting in the dirt and never in a "proper" garage - and wondered how they do things like balancing and alignment. I've realized that the roads are so bad - EVERYWHERE, that you'll never go fast enough where balance matters. I think in the entire time we've been here we might have made it to 40mph.
